Jan Fowler

is author of the best-selling book, “Hot Chocolate for Seniors”(winner of national & international awards); winner of Gold Halo Award from the So. California Motion Picture Council for Outstanding Literary Achievement; winner of First Place Excellence in Journalism Award (SPJ –Southern CA); Town & Gown “Phenomenal Woman” Award; former television host & KSPA radio host of “Senior Living at its Best with Jan Fowler”; speaker, contributing author for “Savvy Women Revving Up for Success”; founder of Starburst Inspirations, Inc. 501(c) (3) nonprofit which supports Redlands Drug Court. www.janfowler.com. Jan welcomes feedback and comments about her columns and invites you to leave her a message on her website.

“Change Your Thinking, Change Your Life!”

You’ve got to dance like there’s no one watching,

Love like you’ll never be hurt,

Sing like there’s nobody listening,

And live like it’s heaven on earth.

William W. Purkey

Does that sound simple to you?  I hope so.  Because it is. You too, can become beyond ordinary.  Believe you’re hot and you will be.  Don’t be afraid to go after what you want, and most importantly, don’t stop until you get it!

In other words, change your thinking, your outlook, your attitude and expectations for your life by transferring them from the minus to the plus column.  Whatever your circumstances are, figure out a way to make them work for you or make it your goal to break away from them completely if they’re holding you back.

That means move if you must, get a better job, restyle your hair, take up a fun sport or activity, or go back to college.  This way, you’ll begin to feel greater and greater optimism about your future.  Take charge of your expectations for your future by modifying them any way you wish.  The power is in your hands and your dreams for your life–piles and piles of dreams are playfully dancing about deep within your imagination.

Once you take charge of your life and love yourself, others will love you too.  Best-selling author Dr. Wayne Dyer said, Change the way you look at things and the things you look at change.

So for starters, I urge you to master the art of pressing a mental switch and shouting, No! No! No! to silence chattering monkeys inside your head that may be trying to paralyze you with doubt and fear.  I urge you to do this so often and so routinely that it becomes like a knee-jerk reaction.

Take the authority over your life.  Now! Which means steering clear of naysayers whom you already know will try to discourage you from meeting your goal.  I learned to spot them quickly.  And so can you.

Be especially wary of family or friends who feel jealous or envious of you if you have the good fortune of finding love and they don’t.  Some of your friends or family members may not like the fact that once you meet someone new to go places with, that leaves them without a companion to travel or go places with.

It took me years to discover that by keeping my deep-down most private and personal goals to myself which was to find a loving mate and man of my dreams that no one could ever talk me out of going after who or what I wanted.  And it worked.

So I urge you too to keep your hopes and dreams to yourself by staying focused on finding and attracting someone wonderful who will love and adore you just as you do them.  If you change your thinking and stay committed to this goal, I doubt that you’ll ever regret it.